A Week in Life of ExplodedKnee

Ever since I blew out (not up, mind you) my knee, I’m known to everyone around me as Explodedknee, and no longer Explodingbelly. Hence, the title. Even though my belly has been exploding more than before with all that inactivity. This is going to be an extremely long post, because I’ve got a lot to recount and comment, so bear with me.

It has been exactly a week since I’ve been discharged from the hospital from my surgery! A day surgery, which somehow turned into a 2-night stay, because my surgeon has no faith that I would protect his work of art in my knee. It’s weird but I kinda enjoyed my stay there. I somehow find new experiences, no matter good or bad, fun and intriguing.

I used Snapchat for the first time on the 3rd of July, the day of the surgery because I thought it would be fun for myself to keep a chronologue of this pretty cool experience. After all, it is not everyday your doctor arranges an op 1 day after you visit him for the very first time. I was expecting him to schedule it 2 or 3 weeks later because that’s what usually happens. He thought otherwise, because he saw hope in my meniscus, that apparently tore, flipped over and got caught between the femur and tibia. Sounds painful, and yes it is really damn painful especially when I can’t straighten my leg at all. An early repair would increase the chance of recovery of the meniscus, which otherwise be shaved off most of the time! So, I guess I’m really lucky because I would have a rather intact meniscus if it heals well, rather than an incomplete one! Hoho! A Right ACL Reconstruction and Meniscus Repair was then called for the very next day!

Here’s my snapchat of the 2 days, pre and post-op!

Here’s the recount of it in my very own words, although I know a video speaks a 100 X a thousand words, but my narcissistic self thinks you guys will like my writing more. BECAUSE MY THOUGHTS ARE SO FUNNY, RIGHT? HAHA!

In fact, when I heard about how soon the op was, I didn’t know what to feel. I was happy because that means I can start my rehab sooner, however, I know I should be feeling a little apprehensive at the same time because after all, I’m going to get cut up. Yet, I just couldn’t make myself feel nervous. I was literally feeling NEUTRAL, for the first time of my life, towards this random event that has popped up from nowhere on my calendar. The only depressing part was that I had to fast from 10.30am onwards, because my surgery was scheduled to start at 5pm!

My parents then drove me to Mount Elizabeth, where we suddenly got a free upgrade to a 2-bedder. Something that I later regret, and felt extremely stupid for not choosing a single room since hospitalization was covered by insurance. HAHA! We made a huge din in the room because we thought it was empty, and to our horror, we heard snoring after a good 15 minutes of talking at the top of our lungs. Shit, right? Haha! I excitedly got changed into the hospital gown and thought I looked so cute and innocent in it. Then it suddenly struck me that I was actually going for a surgery and I panicked and died a little inside, and panicked even more because I thought my op was at 5.30, when it actually is at 5. A LOT OF DIFFERENCE OK.

When the nurses arrived to wheel me on the bed to the Operating Theatre (OT), all that was in my mind was, WA I WISHED I COULD HAVE VIDEO-ED THIS DOWN because the moving bed, the passing fluorescent lights, EXACTLY LIKE A CHANNEL 8 DRAMA. Entering the OT was an experience of its own because I realized how very fortunate I was to have been conscious and in such high spirits to even survey my surroundings and talk to the nurses there, while there might have been people who were struggling for their last breaths when they were there or have been so nervous for their surgery because there can be so much repercussions on their quality of life depending on the success or failure, while I was just there for a few incisions on my knee. Yes, I get deep thoughts at inappropriate moments.

It was pretty cool to be briefed by the anesthetist and a chat with him about the different methods of anesthesia. I’ve gained so much knowledge through this little injury, I can’t even put in words how happy I am, even though I shouldn’t really be happy about hurting myself. There were a couple of operating rooms in the OT, and I didn’t know it was so huge in there! Everything along the aisle was just so white and clean.

We entered the automated doors and this was exactly how the Operating Room looks like with like 12 other nurses being busy everywhere getting ready for the op. “Being treated like royalty” just like what the anesthetist told me. I was then transferred from the bed I was wheeled in to the operating bed, where I laid there for a good 15 minutes feeling a little awkward, because everyone was just being so busy while I was just lying down there and chilling, and like want to sleep but cannot sleep. So I spent the 15 minutes looking at the screen and monitoring my resting heart rate, which was 52bpm, so I tried getting myself excited to increase it, and while I was having fun playing with my heart rate, I realized that shit, everyone else could also see the huge ass screen at every corner of the room. That, was possibly one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. My doctor then came bursting in 5 minutes late, and I overheard the nurses saying that he was having a chat just outside the room. HEY, AM I NOT IMPORTANT?

He then signed on my right leg to make sure it was the leg to be operated on, which I asked to be left there for me to snap a picture after, but the nurses washed it away unfortunately. I was then told that I would fall asleep at the count of 10, but after counting to 10, I was still pretty awake. Just as I was thinking, WALAO CHEAT MY….

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I woke up briefly, felt a tube dripping and being removed from my mouth. Something the anesthetist said would happen because a tube is put through my throat to help me breathe, but I would most likely forget because of the induced amnesia. SO I MADE SURE I REMEMBERED IT and then I fell into deep sleep again, and felt myself being wheeled out of the room to the waiting area.

I woke up feeling extreme pins and needles in my foot, extremely groggy and very hungry. While I was feeling so sick and groggy, my surgeon was all chirpy and loud, I swear if I could, I would have put a hand to his face and said STOP. HAHA! He explained that he placed also injected a nerve blocking thing in my hip to keep my entire right leg numb, and the pins and needles were the effect of it wearing off. I thank every God possible for that uncomfortable sensation because I’ve heard of a COUPLE OF FRIENDS, not just ONE, that they woke up to excruciating pain in their knee because the painkillers wore off when they woke up. HENG AH.

GROGGY is probably an understatement to how I felt. A better description would be FUCKING GROGGY, together with an extremely uncomfortable sensation in my foot, a huge and heavy right leg, and a very uncomfortably numb heel. I was then wheeled out to my favorite faces in the world, my mum, dad, and Benny. At the same time, I was also feeling like shit because I know I looked like shit when they saw me yet i couldn’t do anything about it, but to pray that Benny would still love me. HAHA! Going into my room and being lifted to my bed was HELL, because they just threw me on my bed and my knee hurt like a bitch, I yelled and all the nurses just laughed at me. Up till now, I still don’t know why it was so funny, but very pain ok?

It was 8.30pm. WOW. I was in there for so damn long?! My family then came in and I really wanted to give everyone a hug, but everyone was annoying the shit out of me by talking to me and trying to get my attention. It’s like omg I am fine, I’m GROGGY, my leg hurts, and I’m scared to move my leg, BUT I AM FINE. JUST. STOP. TALKING. Then, my bestest friend in the world, Chew Shian came in with some Japanese grapes and yogurt drink.
 I just had to. No matter how much I was dying. These grapes were so poppingly good. YUM.

Oh, I haven’t mentioned that when I realized that there would be an icing machine after my op, I was so excited that I looked for it the first thing I woke up. I still think it is pretty cool because it’s an icing machine! It was wrapped around my heavily wrapped knee while ice cold water was being pumped through the pipes and sorts to keep my knee iced. My brother was so excited to take a look at my knee, but to our dismay, we didn’t get to see anything because of this Game Ready (the icing machine). And I just felt like I had a log for a right leg.

I chased everyone out of the room because my head was so heavy, I swore when i turned to my left, I thought it was going to drop off because it’s that heavy and useless. I tried to catch some Zs while they were gone but I immediately felt better when everyone left, so I just meddled with my phone and hopped on to Instagram as usual, until Benny came back for me. I sincerely did not know that he was going to stay for the night because I thought they said visiting hours till 8pm only what! I had my first munch at about 10pm, a pretty good sandwich from the hospital.. OMG my standard drop, I know.

And then, my 2 favorite people came – Ms Tan and Yao. I was EXHILARATED. Don’t know why I was so happy to see them, but it was like COMFORT PEOPLE. To my surprise and tickles, they suddenly laid out a whole table full of Zi Char spread and I just burst out laughing because it was just a ridiculous sight in the hospital. HAHA! We had a muted dinner, BECAUSE the occupant of the next bed was being a massive bitch by secretly telling on us to the nurse and SECURITY GUARD through texting her father. WE WERE WHISPERING SO SOFTLY I ALMOST COULDN’T HEAR MYSELF, but still kena. I’m sorry I would have offered you some of the spread if you were friendlier, but NO. Bitch. Okay even though it was pretty late then, I understand why she was being a bitch, but she was so unfriendly, avoided any form of eye contact and dao-ed us right from the start, I just could not empathize with her.

The remaining of whatever that’s left of the night was basically hell. I couldn’t sleep at all because my muscles kept spasming and my knee hurt every time I fell asleep. I slept in 30 minute intervals for like 3 sets and stayed awake for the rest. I was so afraid to move my leg, I had no idea why, but was so thankful that Benny was just there for me the entire night. Seeing him just made me feel so at ease and safe. Aww… right? But really, I HAVE MY VULNERABLE MOMENTS OK. Oh, oh I also had to pee so badly at night, but I was handed a bed pan. I couldn’t pee. It was cool peeing in a bed pan though.

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Day 2 was not any better. My morning started off with the massive clanging and chattering outside the room as the nurses changed shifts and shit. I had my not-so-cafe-quality french toast and just stared at Benny basically, until my doctor came and decided for me that I should stay for one more night so that he can keep me from screwing up the meniscus repair. The worst part was when the physiotherapists arrived for my 15 minute physiotherapy session.

They ripped away my Game Ready, and I finally saw my log-like right leg. Wow. It hurts just looking at it. And then I was told to lift my leg. I tried with all my might, and I couldn’t. Words can’t describe how devastating what was. I don’t even want to go there because in my mind, it was just fuck fuck fuck fuck what the fuck, I work out so hard for fuck. So, with help I got out of my bed, and feel the blood going into my legs as my knee screamed in pain. WTF. And I tried to walk. Walking felt so new, and stupid as well because my leg was as stiff as it was heavy – a log.

And this was how it went. You know when the physio accidentally poked into the side of my knee, it felt massively swollen, numb, painful, and wow. I felt like I didn’t want to walk again until the pain subsided.

The second day was fun because all my friends came and Chris from Ah Bong’s Italian came with PASTA! I ate so much I swore I gained the 4kg I lost. When night fell, it was probably one of the worst nights of my life because I just felt so extremely emotional, and I was immersed in self-pittance. Stupid, I know. But that makes us human hor. I just thought about how much I was working out just a few weeks ago, thought about how I should be training for sunig then, and the fact that even getting out of bed and going to the toilet was such a challenge for me, I just broke down. Cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry. Then I thought about how fucking long 6 weeks is and honestly, the moment when I got injured, I didn’t think I could only go back on court a year later. I thought it would take like 4 months max. So I cry and cry and cry and cry and cry again. Until I got over myself and tried to sleep. When I tried to sleep, every single time I fall asleep, my muscles go into spasm and my knee hurts like, never before. And that happened thrice, before I gave up sleeping altogether, and cry somemore cause it was so fucking tough then. Until Benny arrived. And I just cannot cry in front of people, so I just stopped crying altogether and ate a chocolate bread.

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It’s funny how life works out some times. I’m just thankful for all the major ups and downs in life I’ve had on a regular basis, because that makes me feel like I’m truly living and alive. It’s the moments that bring you down that you learn most about yourself, and it is kind of amazing how everything manages to fall into place in retrospect, when you try to make sense out of it.

Like how I feel that taking the module on Advanced Abnormal Psychology last sem is something that fits snugly into my life because the only message I got out from there was the message from the class of Mindfulness in ACT. In mindfulness, my prof often says that, “The wise change what they can, and accept what they cannot change.”. That is, in essence, what we all have to do in life. And that is what resonates in my mind all the time, especially in times like these.

I don’t know, I haven’t found the reason to why I’m so suay like this, but I know one day I’ll look back and realize that it happened to pave way for something else life has in store for me. It sucks that this happened, but I can’t change the fact that it did. The best way out, is to change the way I perceive this seemingly insignificant event in the big portrait of my life, and learn to appreciate the fact that this happened to me and, not to anyone else.
 At least I had steak for dinner at a hospital hor. And I have a shape shifter leg. See how my calf can have dents? So disgusting and cool at the same time.

Because life is unfair lor.

“You know it’s not fair that I’ve worked so hard, and everything is just gone in the matter of seconds.”

“That’s life. You can earn tons of money, have huge house and a great family, and then you die the next day.”

“That’s true. But.. I really worked so hard for this…”

“Nothing in this world is fair, and you live to die anyway.”

17 seconds. That was the last I saw on the game clock. I remember driving hard to the left to attempt to score a quick basket because the stupid coach kept telling them I’m a right hander. Then I saw 3 defenders. I lost the ball slightly. I felt a nudge. Felt my right leg caving in, in the wrong angle. Felt the weirdest snap in my knee. Fell. Tried to get up because I hate wincing like a weakling on court. Only to be hit by the most excruciating pain I’ve ever felt in my life.

“WTF. Don’t tell me my last season ends in such a pathetic fashion?”
“WTF. I’m in HONG KONG LEH.”

These were the first 2 thoughts that surfaced in my mind, but of course not in such grammatically sane sentences. Can’t think anymore. My right calf was just numb. My leg feels paralyzed. My knee was exploding in pain. Is this what they mean when they say paralyzed with pain? Deep breathing x 2. Hey, it feels a little better. Oh fuck. No. And it was the worst physical struggle to actually roll myself on to my back. Got to the bench, and then it struck me that, all that I’ve done to gear me towards my very last Sunig seemed irrelevant right now. There was just no Sunig to talk about. And, being a loser, I just cried so hard, until I realized that the game has already ended.

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Ever since the last season ended, I never stopped working out because I wanted to be stronger for the upcoming season. I just didn’t want to let my fitness that have been built up through training waste away. Forced myself to wake up at 7 during the exam period, just to work out to fit everything into my schedule. Switched my routines to involve crazy amounts of circuit training and tabata, and going for runs at night, just to make sure that I kept up with not just strength, but cardiovascular fitness. I hated panting like a dog, and going dizzy with the intensity. But I knew it would all be worth it. Being fitter meant I wouldn’t struggle as much in training, and reducing the risk of injuring myself when summer training started.

I did not work on anything basketball related, ironically. Because I was afraid I would be working on the wrong stuff, and getting my countless of bad habits ingrained even further, like my shooting form. I set my mind to absorb as much as I could when training started again, improve on the poor fundamentals and be a bigger threat for the team.

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I have never been more excited to play in an overseas competition until this BIG. We’ve played HKU before, and they were worthy opponents. In fact, I was looking forward to every game because I know they will pose a different challenge for us, an experience that we will not be able to get in Singapore, and we will definitely improve as a team.

My mother asked me if I regretted going on this trip. Getting myself wrecked in our very first game, with exactly 5 (FIVE WTF FIVE) seconds to go, and going through all that shitty medical procedures later. I don’t. Not a tinge of regret. We may not have won the competition (AS USUAL). I’m glad we screwed up, and had the opportunity to thrash things out, just to get to know each other better on court and off court. The greatest take away of this trip was, seeing how the captains in the team stepped up to the plate to lead the team. This reassured me that the decision we made was right, and that it was a sign from heaven that I should be a talent scout in future and earn a lot of money.

Honestly, I have wanted to pass the captaincy to JM for the longest while, but never did till recently, because we felt that she was too nice (albeit damn bloody bitchy) and quiet (OMG?!) to actually lead the team. I’m glad I finally did, because seeing her bringing the team together through this trip, and helping the team work out our differences on court, puts a smile on my face and let me know that my job is done here.

I digress.

The last week had been the longest week of my life, and I was deprived of the opportunity to put a closure to this premature ending to my season, and perhaps, career. I’ve always planned to end my career on a high in this upcoming sunig, and just leave basketball for good to concentrate on more adult responsibilities. This injury has caused me more pain emotionally than physically.

For the past 7 days, every day had been a struggle to put a smile on my face and pretend that I’m happy with the rank of being the Honorary Advisor of the team. Haha what the fuck. It fucking hurts in every single video session and team talk, knowing that all these shit are no longer relevant to me. Ever. Just because of a stupid fall that happened in a matter of seconds. The countless times I had to prevent myself from tearing up at games, and feeling so helpless, because you knew what you could contribute to the team, but you can’t, and the fact that you’ll never have the chance to play alongside these amazing individuals, in the team that have grown so much and changed over the 4 years.

Every night when I close my eyes, the scene just keeps replaying in my head, making me wonder if I’m actually suffering from PTSD. Unbelievable. And I hated moments when I am alone, even at the closing ceremony.. Tears just well up in my eyes uncontrollably, no matter how much I tell myself that it’s okay, and it’s REALLY okay. It’s so tough. Basketball has always been part of me, and part of my life. I hate training, I hate being tired. But I hate not being able to train, even more.

Last night, when I finally got home, and finally had all the time to myself, I just cried like a stupid shit for god knows how long. When I thought that things would get better from last night, every now and then since, like literally now, the plumbing works are still faulty, and I just cried a river while typing this.

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Of course, I know that everything has its bright side as well. Despite being an emotional wreck, and a cripple, this injury has been quite an experience for me! Like honestly. I got to ride an ambulance, IN HONG KONG!! How bloody cool. I even took a selfie with Kynneth in the ambulance. NO MATTER HOW PAIN ALSO MUST TAKE.
I got to talk nonsense to the paramedics who were so amused because I told them the only cantonese words I knew were siew mai and har gao. Talking cock is my talent because I can still do it despite being in SO MUCH FREAKING PAIN, especially when the ambulance goes over a hump or a bumpy road.

I also got to experience the horrible service by the doctor at A&E after a 3 hour wait, and have my knee stuck in the position that I fell in for 2 whole days.  And forced to walk on an old man walking stick, which was the most fucking stupid idea ever, and very, very, very, very fucking painful. I remember needing to pee at 3am on the night of the injury, and I just.. Could not get up. Not with that pokfulam walking stick.  Then I also experienced being treated like royalty here in the private hospital. So cool. And being wheeled around like a kid again. Also, the CAFETERIA in the hospital is actually as atas as a din tai fung restaurant. I also got to see 3 syringes of blood being drained from my knee! COOL SHIT. It was after draining then the doctor realized that I might have tore my ligament. UH. NOT SO SMART, DOCTOR.

Got my first experience at the fucking loud MRI machine as well. And then coming out to my beloved friends, who delivered egg tarts over. Thank you Eddie, Gerrard and Wan Xin! Seriously love you guys to the moon and back.   Spending the rest of my crippled days with the most amazing team mates, and the 3 of them who made sure I was safe everyday, and never fail to accompany me for amazing food. Times spent with you guys were the best parts of this journey! Here’s a behind the scenes picture of our McD’s delivery. Thank you chiobufairy, jiamin and jiale for the love. Seriously, I can’t thank you guys enough and our insanity was the only thing that kept me sane throughout the trip.

And of course, getting the love and mockery by the 2 people who have impacted my life so much for the past 4 years in the team, Yao and Ms Tan. Don’t ever think you guys would see this, but I’m just really thankful for the guidance I’ve received since I stepped into NUS. I’m truly thankful for you guys for opening my eyes to the world of basketball, and bursting my bubble of ego that I’ve been living in for the first 9 years of my career. I look back on my career and realized what a little punk I had been. Thinking that I’m on the top of the world because I can drive into 3 defenders and score. Because I can bunny hop between 2 defenders (which usually ends up in a turnover. But I only remember the good times). Because I can fast break. I can’t imagine how you guys had the ability to change me to someone who was so reckless, who can NEVER shoot (and NEVER believe I could), and don’t think on court, to a slightly better version of me, today. Seriously, I NEVER. NEVER shoot in games. Not even in year 2. Because every ball released is just going to be an airball or it will just hit the board and fly away, yet now I’m someone who takes her shots and some times even have more confidence in my shots than drives. Thank you for your patience, and making me realize that I needed more arsenal in my offense, and for forcing me to defend because I never did. It’s been a long and arduous journey, I know it took me long enough to see my imperfections and flaws, but thank you for standing by me to keep me motivated even at the most frustrating times.

Also, thank you for going through so much shit to get my crutches for me, and accompanying me when I’m alone. As much as I’ve been mocked at by Ms Tan, more than by anyone else, thank you for the many deep conversations like the one at the start of my post. You’ve taught me more than just basketball, you’ve taught me so much about life, because everything you say just makes so much sense. I could never thank you two enough. I’m just glad our lives crossed paths, and I’m beyond lucky to have not only 2 basketball coaches, but also mentors in life.

  Oh and through this, I got a chance to witness atrophy on my own body, and watch my foot swell like a balloon. This is how much my muscles have shrunk after 1 week, and that’s just BEYOND cool, and fucking heartwrenching. You know how much I jumped and sprinted to get such thunder thighs?!

The other positive from this experience is learning to celebrate little victories in life, like being able to straighten my leg a little more each day, having lesser pain as the days go by, and being able to walk on a single crutch. These make me genuinely happy and motivated, and I hope it lasts for the next year.

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I’ve an extremely long road ahead of me. Surgery, rehab and thesis. I can’t wait to work out again, I can’t wait to walk and run again, and I can’t wait to get back on court again. If I ever do decide on playing competitively, I’ll come back stronger than ever, and work on my fundamentals in the longest break I’ve ever taken in the entire 12 years of my career. SERIOUSLY. I think my previous record was missing training for 2 weeks, and I cried like SHIT already. So, this is legit reason for me to mope for a longer while, but no.

I’m a grown up and I can deal with shit. HMPH.

/edit: oh shit I didn’t know people actually read my blog, thanks for the messages and yes, I tore my ACL, together with my meniscus and a partial tear on my MCL. My knee must be pretty weak shit to end up like this from just a fall.

A first look at Lion City Kitty: The Cat Museum, Muses & Mansion

UPDATE: June Holidays Special!

Inclusive of their usual operation hours (Scroll to bottom of the post), they are now open at these additional dates too!
Tuesday(2^nd, 9^th, 16^th, 23^rd of June): 10am – 1pm

There will also be a Kiddie Cats Camp in June, which aims to educate children on proper and responsible cat care, as well as to change any misconceptions or stigmas they have about cats and show them why they are so easy to love! The camps are on:

Sign up here: http://thecatmuseum.com.sg/?page_id=627

The following consists of what you should expect at Lion City Kitty:

This post contains a rather complete rundown of Singapore’s first ever cat museum. Is it worth the entry fee of $9? Read and decide for yourselves! Lion City Kitty: The Cat Museum, Muses and Mansion officially opens on 9 January 2015.

I’m usually not the museum kind of person. In fact, I’m a museum’s worst nightmare because I love to touch everything in sight. Yet, this time I made a reservation for the sneak preview to Singapore’s first cat museum without any hesitation after I saw an article on it, because they had REAL CATS available for us to play with in the museum (pretty much like a cat cafe), and most of all, my boy is a ailurophile (this was one of the cool things I’ve learnt from my visit to the cat museum), i.e. a cat lover.

So, we paid Lion City Kitty a visit on its last day of its sneak preview on Sunday (28/12/2014). Do not expect anything much, like a large scale museum, such as that of the ArtScience museum, or Asian Civilization museum, with fancy entrances and an entire building dedicated just for them. This was pretty much what I envisioned before visiting the museum, and well.. I was very surprised when we arrived.

Nestled along Purvis Street, a few doors away from the ever popular French restuarant, Saveur, lies a flight of stairs in a random hole in the wall.
 We would have totally missed the entrance to the museum if not of this little poster. Besides, even after seeing it, we were still pretty unsure if we should climb up the flight of stairs because it seems rather unorthodox to have such an entrance to a museum, according to the schema of our past visits to other museums on school excursions and what not.  So, here’s the entrance, which we only decided to climb after being warmly welcomed by the greeter from the museum.
Quotes like these about cats can be seen all around the museum, and this was just one of the many we spotted on our way up.

When you reach the top of the flight of stairs, it is a really small space, where the staff from the museum would require you to remove your shoes to put them in the lockers provided. Do remember to prepare either a new $1 coin or old 50 cent coin for you to operate the lockers. The coins are fully refundable after you are done with the use. The removal of shoes is to ensure cleanliness and hygiene to keep the environment clean for the cats in the museum.

After removing your shoes, you would be led into a rather narrow path into the museum, where posters of cats are put up, and you would then arrive at the counter where you will have to pay the entrance fee of $9 per pax.
Some infographics about how to interact with cats before you enter the museum.

Here’s the map as an overview to the cosy cat museum:

Level 2: The Museum

Here, you would be introduced by the staff to the museum, as well as to the various artworks of felines and cats by artists, which are up for sale. Interesting stories about cats and their owners are also put up for your reading interest. For example, 
The art pieces and photographs which are up for sale!
There are also nuggets of interesting facts available interspersed amongst the art pieces.
Cute kitty soft toys are also put on display, such as cosplaying cats in Elsa’s outfit and these cutie pies.   That is about it for the 2nd level. As you proceed to the 3rd level, it is where all the community cats are being housed. These are cats that have been selected by the Cat Welfare Society to put up for adoption. This level is designed to allow people to socialize with these cats so that it is easy to find a match between the potential adopters and the little felines!

Level 3: The Muses Gallery

This level is set up to match the social mission of the museum to educate and encourage people to adopt cats, instead of buying them. It also exhibits posters that trace cat’s lineage throughout the Singapore history, from the Japanese occupation, colonial times and to the present day. They even have a huge map of Singapore, where cat owners are encouraged to pin a photo of their cats on their location of residence. They also have bite sized info on the various cat species found on that level!

Here’s a look at some of the cats on the 3rd level! From our experience from the various visits to the cat cafes at BKK and the one in Singapore, the time which we visited them at about 3pm, was their napping time because cats are nocturnal! Hence, some of the cats there were all fast asleep, or have that annoyed look because we woke them up specially to get a picture of them. Hahaha!
 This cat was sleeping like a sleeping beauty because LOOK AT THAT. I would love to sleep forever on that furry mat too. This is the entirely black cat which I couldn’t quite catch it in color because it just looks like its silhouette.
Sleepy handsome cat.

Level 4: The Mansion

The Mansion houses the resident cats, including Harry, the cross-eyed cat, who happens to be the mascot of the museum because of its special appearance. Here, there are 9 cats who were rescued and have their background stories blown up on posters hanging on the walls of the museum on this level.
This level has all the toys and scratching posts, as well as cat nips, every cat in the world could ask for. There’s no wonder why it’s called The Mansion. Here’s a look at the resident kitties!

 Here’s Harry who was sleeping soundly when we approached him. We didn’t realize it was Harry until he opened his eyes and we got the most pleasant surprise of our lives to find that he’s actually Harry and REALLY REALLY CROSS EYED. I’m so thankful that he woke up and held his pose for a good 10s, before snuggling back to sleep.
 Angie, the Mainecoon, looking so pretty with her leopard prints.  This is Brad, the resident grumpy cat who weighs a hefty 8kg, and sleeps whenever and where ever he wants.

And I guess we were lucky to have caught Georgie humping on Julia right in front of a crowd. Animal instincts right on point. Hahaha!

It is unfortunate that we were unable to get pictures of all the cats, nor have the chance to play with all of them because they were either fast asleep or there were just too many people surrounding them in a small area. We just had to wait around for the crowd to clear before playing with some of them, or head down to visit the cats at the Muses before heading up to the Mansion, or vice versa.

It was nevertheless a great experience at the Cat Museum, and I have never had such great fun visiting a museum. Paying just a mere fee of $9 to play with these cats, and to learn more about cats and their history was definitely worth the time and the money. This place is the perfect place for cat lovers to visit and hang out. Even for the non cat lovers, this museum may very well just change your opinion of cats! A word of caution though, it may get really crowded when it opens officially, and that may hamper your experience, a teeny bit. 

Just thought this fun fact from the museum would be the perfect ending to this purr-fect experience that we’ve had at the museum. It’s just so difficult to pass up on the chance to use the word purr-fect eh? 

How to get there?

8 Purvis Street
#02-02
Singapore 188587

Opening Hours (from 9 January 2015)

Fridays: 4:30pm – 7:30pm

Saturdays and Sundays: 12:00noon – 3:30pm, 4:30pm – 7:30pm (Closed from 3:30pm – 4:30pm for Kitty Kat Nap)

Entrance fee: S$9 (free for kids aged 6 & below)
Payment mode: Cash only

Review: Spuds And Aprons (+ Benny’s 26th)

This is a continuation of the previous post.. 

Third Surprise

We returned to Studio M after dinner, and while he was showering, (I put on my lingerie and posed seductively, and said “Draw me like one of your French girls”; but I’m too cool for this seductive nonsense) I placed 2 Gold Class tickets underneath his pillow, like Willy Wonka’s golden tickets! I had to go down all the way to vivo to get the tickets the day before so that I could do this okay! Hahaha!

The reason why I thought giving him the Gold Class tickets were a good idea because:

1. I remembered him passing a random remark about wanting to go to gold class to catch a movie with me.
2. He wanted to watch the Expendables, because he’s a dude. SO. MUCH. ACTION.

So that was it for the first day!

In the morning, we went down to have the breakfast buffet at Studio M, which served up the usual breakfast food like eggs, bread, sausages and bacon. Not a wide spread, but good enough to stuff ourselves so much that we didn’t need an actual lunch! After which we checked out, and since there was ample time to waste before our movie, we decided to head on down to my favorite place, Prive at Keppel Bay! 

I’m not going to do an actual review on Prive again, because I’ve done one up earlier this year, over here! This time, we ordered 2 cakes and drinks, just enough to keep us satiated till dinner!

Malted Maltesers ($12++): It was indeed as sinful as it sounds, but this tastes just amazing! A perfect drink on a hot day, and a great drink for one who loves Maltesers! Toffee Nut Latte ($5.50++): I thought this tasted better than the one at Starbucks, which I really love. Just short of the sprinkles, but the toffee nut taste was stronger and much more fragrant than that of Starbucks! Cheaper too!

  Hazelnut Praline Royale Cake ($8++): This was just divine! All the cakes I’ve had at Prive so far are amazing. Moist, chocolatey, and most of all, it wasn’t too sweet! I especially love the crunch at the base of the cake. Ah how I crave for another now!
 S’mores Cupcake ($4++): Another novelty item. The afro head of the cupcake was just loads of marshmallows melted together, giving it a real sticky and soft texture! Quite good in my opinion, but the cupcake was a little too crumbly. Worth a try cause it’s so cute! (:
So here’s our afternoon fill at Prive, just chilling and talking about everything in the world before the movie starts! Here’s the menu at Prive!

We went on for our movie after which. I forgot to snap pictures of the whole experience, but it was my first time there, and I thought it wasn’t worth that $38 I paid for each of us, cause it just consisted of a reclining seat and a blanket. I fell asleep during the movie, cause there was too much action as usual. I could get a similar napping experience in a regular cinema too! Hahaha! But really, they ought to up their game if they are charging thrice the amount for a ticket!

Fourth Surprise

After which, we headed to Spuds & Aprons, a bistro at the peak of Faber Park, which I only told him after the movie (cause he needed to fetch me there…)!

The Place

I wasn’t into taking pictures previously, I think it’s a pity though because this place is beautiful. Situated on the peak of Mount Faber, overlooking Keppel Bay and Sentosa Island, you could also see cable cars coming up from Sentosa. A breathtaking view. Spuds and Aprons occupies a huge space with both indoor and outdoor seating. The indoor air conditioned Dining Area can sit up to 48 pax, while the alfresco garden has a capacity of 160 pax.

I initially reserved a table at the Al Fresco dining area because of the good view, however I changed it later, thinking that it wouldn’t be too nice if the weather gets too humid and warm at night. However, when I was there, it was pretty breezy since the bistro is located at the peak. We still went ahead with the little indoor area because of its cosy atmosphere, which shared the similar view as well.

The Food

One of the best things here is that, you would expect the prices of the food to be pretty steep given the location of the bistro. However, to our surprise, they were affordable, and by affordable I mean, their price tags are similar to your average cafe prices (cheaper than some even!). The menu can be found here! You guys can seriously consider coming here for your various celebrations or just have a nice chill out at this place!

We ordered their popular Wicked Fries and Gravy ($8) for our appetizer! For our mains, we had Crispy Pork Belly ($26) and Barbecued Baby Back Ribs ($26), and a Chempedek Bread and Butter Pudding ($10). 

Wicked Fries and Gravy ($8): You would love this if you love cheesy stuff because this is a dish with spuds (potatoes) and 6 types of cheeses! A real cheesy dish, worth every single calorie. This dish is good to share because it gets a little too much after a while!  Baby Back Ribs ($26): ribs with their homemade barbecued sauce, served with a side of salad and fries! The meat was tender and well-marinated! And the portion was just right for a single serving!  Crispy Pork Belly ($26): I will order anything pork belly. If it’s on the menu, it would be on the table. Hahaha! These crispy pork belly was just what I expected. The meat was tender, and the skin was crackling crispy and good! However, it may be a little too hard, because we both had some difficulty trying to cut through the crispy skin. Probably not a dish for folks with weak teeth! Hahaha!
Our dinner spread!
 Here’s us with our wefie cause it’s his special day, so it warrants a 101 pictures with him! 

  Chempedek Bread and Butter Pudding ($10): Croissant with creamy custard, and chempedek served with Haagan Daz Vanilla ice cream. A rather unique fusion dish. However, even though it tasted great with the initial bites, we got sick of it pretty quickly because what ever Chempedek was, it tasted quite weird.   Surprise Birthday cake! which I forgot to confirm with them till the afternoon itself. I had to sneak to the toilet before the movie to call them for this. Hahaha! They would probably charge you from $8-$10 for this cake, and it tastes really good, so it’s fine! (: So, here’s my boy with his cake, and looking really funny to me now, because of his hair. Hahaha! Oh, and we witnessed a marriage proposal too! SUPER SWEET!

How to get to Spuds and Aprons

109 Mount Faber Road, Level 2 Singapore 099203

Opening Hours

11am to 11pm (Sun to Thur)
11am to 1am
(Fri, Sat & Eve of Public Holiday

Spuds and Aprons will be offering their Christmas Menu from 1 December onwards, probably a good time to visit them then! 

Here’s the little polaroid we took after I placed the not-so-little book on the table while he went to the toilet! Hahaha! It’s rare for him to agree taking so many pictures in a day okay? So must exploit this opportunity! 

So that was the end of our 2 day celebration of his birthday! I highly recommend Spuds and Aprons for any one who’s looking for an affordable fare for any occasion. The location may be a little inaccessible and inconvenient, but you could always catch a cab up Mt Faber from Vivo City, and won’t get lost like us… Hahaha!

Thank you for being mine all these while, babe! You’ve given me more smiles than any one had, and thanks for always doing everything to make me happy. You’re the definition of perfection, and I’m not even trying to be nice when I say that. Hahaha!  

Review: Five and Dime (+ Benny’s 26th!)

I’ve been wanting to do up this post since 2 months ago, but I’ve been bombarded by so much good food and work that I haven’t had the time to do this! This review has an exclusive blog story about how we celebrated Benny’s 26th birthday and a review of the few places we’ve been to on that day!

Some of you may have know that I had been planning for these 2 days since 1.5 months before the day. Since his birthday was on a Sunday, I decided to make it a 2-day celebration, and it was a very stressful 1.5 months to not blurt out everything to him, cause I tell him everything. Hahaha!

I planned for a 2D1N staycation at Studio M, cause we haven’t had proper alone time for the longest while. I just thought that spending time with me would be the best present he could get. Hahaha! My skin as thick as elephant, I know. I intended this as a surprise, however, as the days got closer, I realized that it would be difficult for me to keep it a surprise because he has to fetch me there on his bike right, and I have to get him to pack his clothes.. BUT I managed to keep it a secret until the day itself when he picked me up from Liang Court. That’s a huge win ok?

He picked me up from Liang Court because he had to work on Saturday morning and I was thankful for that cause that bought me more time for this:
It was so last minute because the 40+ photos I’ve ordered to print only arrived on Friday night, and I’ve to get all of these ready by Saturday morning. Thank goodness I’ve been religiously writing little notes to him everyday since the day I started planning for this weekend to get the book filled! Here are some snippets of my very beautiful drawing:

Surprise #1

So thankfully I finished up whatever that’s left just before he arrived, and we headed off to Studio M! It took us about 10 minutes to queue for our check in, and even though we arrived after the check in time of 2pm, they still haven’t got a room ready for us, and they promised to call us when it’s ready in an hour or so. BUT UNTIL 4plus 5, THEY STILL HAVEN’T CALLED. I PAY SO MUCH TO STAY IN THE ROOM AND NOT WAIT UNTIL SO LATE OK? (Yes, I still remember even after 3 months, cause I’m a grudge bearing bitch). 

Since we had to wait, we decided to grab us some lunch at Five & Dime! The place of our “first date”, kinda!

Flashback: The First Date

Omg, this is so awkward but I remember every single moment spent with this boy and thinking about it just makes me beam so widely. The first time we met and spent time together was actually unplanned, so this was our first planned meeting. The annoying boy signed up for the same 10km run so that he could run with me, and I was so annoyed because, omg I’d be so gross and unglam, with my dying pig face during the run because I was so unfit then. And I really thought he’s the hottest guy I knew, and still is the hottest guy I know right now. So it’s gonna be a horrible run, with me trying to not die and look glam, while running with this dude who runs marathons.

Let me make my worries clearer to you guys (damn it I got carried away stalking my own Facebook):
VS.

How to compare? He’s like the ridiculously photogenic guy. Seriously who looks so good running a marathon?

To cut the long story short, we finished, I hit my 10km PB of 51 minutes, and I was as unglam as a dog. Yet, during the run, I looked at him from behind and I was so smitten, and so happy that I finally found someone who would push me over my limits and make me better.

After which, he brought me to Five and Dime, because I’ve once mentioned to him about how much I wanted to try the Golden Custard Lava Cake from there! Guys who pay attention to details like this… HAHAHA!

The Place

Five and Dime is inconveniently located along River Valley Road. Even though it has a bus stop located right opposite it, I haven’t had the chance to locate the buses that go there, and so it’s still inconvenient to me. Both times we were there, we had to walk for about a good 10 minutes to get there.

The eatery has a nice clean exterior, adopting a white and black theme. Whitewashed walls and black fonts, with clear windows spanning the shopfront. Its interior was cosy, with a wooden bar table, brick walls, pastel colored furniture and a huge blackboard with its dessert menu on it. Beware of the chalk board because both times, we succumbed to ordering desserts because we happened to read the menu while having our meals. Hahaha! I love the windows and clear glass doors especially, because it lets in natural light in the day, giving you good quality food pictures.

The Food

We were here twice, and in case you didn’t know, they have different menus offering Brunch food on weekends, Lunch and Dinner! Click here for the menu!

The first time we were there, we were being presented with their dinner menu. I was initially drawn to the Braised Pork Belly ($22), however they were sold out for the day. (This day was also the start of our unlucky food hunts because it seems like the food I want to order would be unavailable when I’m visiting with him! HAHA!). I ordered The Burger ($23) instead, while the boy (wait, he wasn’t my boy then, he was still that guy) ordered the famous Mentaiko Pasta ($18)! We knew we were both made for each other when we decided on ordering 2 desserts cause we have such sweet tooth! We had an Eton Mess ($12), simply because it sounded exotic, and a Vanilla almond cake with ice cream, on the house! 🙂

Some strawberry drink we ordered.

The Burger ($23++): Pork and beef patty, with veggies and a sunny side up, served with a side of shoestring fries! A rather ordinary burger, which wasn’t too impressive!

 Mentaiko Pasta ($18++): A must order when you’re here. Enough said. I loved the mentaiko cream sauce, which was a good amount of savory. The pasta was also springy and it was an absolute delight to have.

 Spiced Eton Mess ($12++): I just stole this from his instagram cause I realized that I didn’t have a picture of it. What is an Eton Mess? It consists of strawberries with spiced meringue in brulee sauce. It just sounds foreign to us, and so we decided to have it. It was pretty okay, but I’m not a fan of meringue, so I’m not too crazy over it!

 Vanilla Almond cake with ice cream: I can’t remember why this was on the house, probably because they forgot our order or something, but free food usually tastes better than it really is. Hahaha! I was really attracted to this dish because it’s so adorable. You would like this if you are a fan of almonds!

Oh and I forgot to mention that, we missed the last portion of the Golden Custard Lava Cake by just one order, and we didn’t get it in the end..

On our second visit, that is on the eve of his birthday, we were lucky enough to catch their brunch menu! I wanted to try the Braised Pork Belly Sandwich, which was served with a side of sweet potato fries, and without a doubt, it was sold out. So, I ordered the Mentaiko Pasta ($18++) instead, while MY boy had the Eggs Benny ($18++). We also had 2 desserts this time round, the GOLDEN CUSTARD LAVA CAKE ($12++) and a Milo Panna Cotta ($8++). 
Eggs Benny ($18++): Poached eggs with Hollandaise sauce, served on a brioche with wagyu slices, with a side of potatoes and fruit salad! I’ve eaten so many brunch food that none of the Eggs Benedict can impress me anymore. Hahaha! If you’re fan of Eggs Benny, then this would be a good rendition of it!   Mentaiko Pasta ($18++): It was still as good as I remembered. The only con to it? One serving is definitely not enough..  Golden Custard Lava Cake ($12++): We finally meet after 6 months… And I was so excited to meet it. LIKE OMG. When it was served in the dimsum straw basket to our table, I nearly died of hyperventilation. 
LOOK AT THAT LIQUID GOLD OOZING OUT. GOODNESS. But frankly speaking, very frankly, it’s just really novelty. Hahaha! I don’t crave for it ever since having it. It’s just chocolate with the custard filling. I would still very much prefer a Liu Sha Bao to any of these twists to the original dish. But this is a good try! Got to try it at least once if you guys are there!    Milo Panna Cotta ($8++): It’s basically like jelly stuff with sticky milo stuff. I was too overwhelmed with the lava cake that I actually neglected this. It’s pretty good a dish, worth a try! 

So we ate till 4 plus 5, and Studio M still hasn’t called us. How horrible right? We then decided to take a stroll back to the place to wait for our check in. Meanwhile, I was busy on my phone planning with his friends about the surprise to spring him tonight! I initially wanted them to come up to our room to have a little party with pizzas and all, but they all had work, and the timing did not quite work out. It was such a stressful lunch actually. Hahaha!

We finally checked into our room, and realized that the hotel forgot to inform us that it was ready. I want to rage at them, but nah, I shall be nice for once. We then spent our afternoon/evening snoozing on the bed, while enjoying some movies on the TV. The room was really small, as you guys would have heard before, but it’s a loft design, which was what attracted me to it in the first place. I forgot to get pictures of the place, and partly because I thought it was difficult to actually get the full view of the room since it’s so high and small. I got the Premier Loft, instead of the Studio Loft, because of the fact that the bed was on the Mezzanine (higher level), rather than the ground floor, which I thought would be cooler and more cosy. Basically, just cheap thrill. Hahaha!

The only picture I took from the bed:
  Yeah, so you can see how high the bed was, and how messy I am, while the boy is a very neat boy. Every time I throw my things anyhowly, I would find it neatly arranged the next time I see it.

Surprise 2!

Since we had a really late lunch, the boy was lazing on the bed watching some food truck cook off, while I was trying to get him out for dinner earlier so his friends could come later, but we only left the room at 9 plus, so his friends and I made a spontaneous change of plan to surprise him at the Bak Kut Teh place, when they started streaming in by batches, which was quite funny to watch.

It’s a pity that we didn’t take a photo together, but I’m glad that the surprise worked!

 & this was what we had for 2 people, cause I said I was craving for meat. We are such gluttons, but that’s also why I love him!

This is it for Day 1, and I’ll see when I’ll have the motivation to write one up for Day 2, which would include the review for Spuds and Aprons at Mount Faber!

The Path Less Travelled

Right now, as much as I want to be an explorer, a lover, an athlete, a scholar, above it all, I just want to be human. Everyone has their own definition of what it means to be human. To me, being human is learning to explore humanity in its own right. I want to learn to love the perfections and imperfections of humanity. I want to meet people, all kinds of people. I want to empathize and live their lives. Hearing about the experiences that parents have with their children with autism, the simple joy, the struggles of their daily lives, have always made me intrigued by how the tiniest activity to us such as maintaining eye contact with the people we interact with, is potentially a milestone for a child with autism. It hurts me to listen to parents talk about how they are unable to spring a hug on their child because it’s not part of the routine, and it might upset them. It breaks my heart to learn how they worry about their child’s future, not in the same way as how your parents or mine do. Our parents worry if we would fall into the wrong company, they hope that we would be successful in life, they wish for us to be happy. These parents with autistic children, worry about how their children deal with things we take for granted like interacting with people in the future; they’d be proud if their child is able to live one day without throwing a tantrum, and could care less if they top the class in school or not; they worry about their child living independently, being able to look after themselves, and not if they earn only $500 a month.  They can live with the rude stares and gossips that people direct at them when their child acts out in public, because they know that they love their child like no other, and do not wish for them to be different.

This was part of what I wrote during the time when I got news of my internship in Pathlight (you can read it here), and I’m glad that at the end of 5 months, this conviction has not wavered a single bit.

Today, marks the end of my 5 month internship at Pathlight School. It’s pretty much a bittersweet feeling towards the end, knowing that you really deserve this break after slogging it out, with trainings and games every 1, 3, 5, 6 after school, and tuitions every 2, 4 ,6, yet at the same time, there is this sense of emptiness within me, when the reality of never setting foot in the school again hits me. The thought of going back to NUS, and not boarding the 7:09am bus 45 to Pathlight every weekday next year, the thought of not writing down checklists and schedules for anyone else, not needing to follow your kid around to the toilet and to get food, not needing to hold on to a clipboard from 7.40 to 2.30pm, not doing up visuals any more, there is no longer need for me to reach school earlier to do traffic duty, nor the need to follow the exact same schedule every day of the week for 5 months. Most of all, there is no longer anyone whom I need to repeat my instructions to at least 50x a day, force to do jumping jacks, and use the ASD lingo of any verb + -ing. As much as they were once dreadful, and at points of time, annoying and exasperating, these are the missing parts of my life right now. My mind is filled with so much conflicting thoughts currently that I can’t seem them to piece them cohesively, yet I don’t want to write this post up any later because I want this void to be filled with good memories.

The Journey

The journey hasn’t been all sunshine and unicorns. It’s not like what most people think, what I am referring to is the sense of fulfillment that you think I would feel at the end of everyday, even though the students can be difficult to manage and all. No. That’s not true at all. It is difficult to find positives in your day, much less to feel fulfillment when you barely have time for yourself everyday. You reach home earliest at 10pm, and you rush to get your dinner in before retiring to bed, and waking up at 540am again in the morning, day in and day out. It might be possible for others to feel fulfilled at the end of the day, knowing that they have impacted the students in one way or another, but not me. I find it so, so tiring, and at times, even dreadful.

Can you imagine, going to school doing the same things everyday. Attempting to teach 17 year old students how to tell time for 2 hours straight, for weeks, and they don’t get it. Students who repeat themselves 30+ times, no matter whether you respond to them or ignore them (yes, I counted). You, trying your best to get them to listen to you, but to no avail. Students who misbehave and your teacher shoots you a death stare when it’s not even within your control. Coming up with more than 100 different versions of the SAME exam paper manually, where you have to shuffle the questions and options, through copy and pasting, and deleting, then waiting for all of them to print and staple them together.

During this internship, it was my first time feeling so helpless for the first time of my life, being unable to get my point through, or not being able to get my students to listen to me. Every other day I’m just so drained with work, gym, training and tuitions. Yet, I know that I am not in any position to complain because this was what I chose. I am not even worthy enough to complain because I am only in this for a mere 5 months. Think about the parents who have to go through this all their lives, and doing even more than it’s required of me. I’ve heard about parents who take the effort to bring their children from one end of Singapore to another, just to encourage good behavior; parents who quit their high flying jobs just to make sure that their child gets the best care, and many, many more. I know all of our parents have sacrificed some parts of their lives just for the sake of giving the best to us, I know that the worry of a parent would never end no matter how old we are, but at least, when we are older, our parents could have it a little easier, as we ease into adulthood. Yet, for the parents we’ve met, they are worried of their child’s future, not whether they would get into the wrong company or making mistakes in life, they have to care about independent living, or the most basic stuff such as trying get them to use words to communicate their needs. Some parents even have to accompany their children to school, and sit at the foyer for the whole duration to make sure that their child stays in school. So, who am I to complain about being tired or frustrated with dealing with the students?

What keeps me going everyday, despite the challenges I face, is seeing how I grow and get better with communicating with my students, celebrating little successes along the way, and not just going for the big win all the time. I remember sharing about what Dr. Lam said about communication being a 2 way thing: the reason why the students are unable to get me, may be simply because I am inexperienced in reading their behaviors and getting my point through. As time passes, you begin to understand the different profiles of your students, their ways of communication, and what is the best way to get them to understand you.

Let me share with you about a small success I celebrated. I had this student in Housekeeping, who constantly have to spray his chemicals more than once on to his cloth, and never listened to any of our commands in class. He is a non-verbal student, and hence, it was initially difficult for me to comprehend his actions and behaviors. I was assigned to him, and have been told to simply supervise him, and that it would be almost impossible for me to change his habits because of his various fixations. When you tell me things like “almost impossible”, all it screams to me is, “Challenge Accepted”. So I got down to trying my best to learn about his profile, and tried all the ways I know to get him to deviate from his fixation of excessive spraying. On good days it worked, but on most days, I just failed embarrassingly. I just nagged at him 2 hours everyday, and shoving visuals into his face, and after getting sneezed in the face by him, and his saliva dripping on my hands, he finally obeyed every single command I gave him one day, and it stayed that way until his assessment. I am glad to say that he got his certification at the Housekeeping worksite, and I thank him for teaching me to celebrate little successes along the way, and finally being able to score a big win. I think that’s probably what we should do in our lives; not discounting our own efforts and keep persisting and believing.

And also, he has been trying to tell me about this character, Rosita from Sesame Street whom I have no idea about for the past 4 months, and one day when I finally found out what he was talking about, when he constantly says “Orange nose’ and “ribbon”, I felt so damn happy. This picture is how we communicate and laugh together from then on. 

I can never stay angry for more than 5 minutes because these students are just so, innocent. Their innocence are simply unrivaled. Can you imagine meeting someone who would shoot you a “OMG OH NO I AM VERY SORRY” look when they purposely do something wrong? I’m sure you will never find people who are as honest and as pure as them, and that’s what makes my heart melt all the time. And just simply sitting around to observe them, just puts a smile on my face, knowing how far they have come in life.

Besides, through this internship, I’ve experienced so much for myself, that is not gained through interacting with my students. I got so many opportunities to talk to people of different walks of life, to go to places that I’ve never been to before, and seen things that I would never have if I were in school. Through this internship, it was the first time I’ve been to some museum, to Gardens by the bay, and even a free trip to USS and to bowl and eat McDonald’s for free. It may not be that big of a deal to the others, but I find these really experiential, such as the free McDonald’s meal because since when would you have to queue for 1.5 hours just to get a meal for your students and order anything you want there? To me, it was really quite fun! Hahaha, cheap thrill but yeah. It was also my first time working a paper cutter, a label maker, doing a recording for the students’ listening component for exams, and watching a 3D printer do its thing. HOW COOL?! And it was also my first time working at a classroom, which is made to simulate a hotel room. Amazing. Just amazing. Lastly, as much as it was dreadful, having to wake up earlier than usual, I even had the chance to do traffic duty, which can get really entertaining at times.

Let’s take a walk down memory lane of all my Firsts with me through all the pictures!

Me on my very first traffic duty! HAHAHA!

My first outing with the school on National Day

 
Second Outing with the school but my virgin trip to Gardens by the Bay!

 
Last outing with the school to USS on the last week of school! And here’s us regretting our decision of taking the Mummy ride, which turned out to be better than we remembered!

I still cannot get used to the fact that I’m being called Ms Clara, or introducing myself as Ms Clara. But Starbucks coffee, with an extra shot is only $2+ here. I love the foyer cafe. LOVE. 

And of course, I’m even more surprised to be on the receiving end of Teachers’ day gifts because I’m definitely am no teacher and will never be one. Still amazingly touched and honored. But it’s still strange. 

And I’ve never been treated as a rubbish bin before. I remembered this conversation very vividly.
“Throw away”
“I’m a rubbish bin is it?”
“Yes” *empties eraser dust and pencil sharpenings on to my hand*

I’ve never seen such a HUGE roll of bubble wrap in my life before as well. 

Looking back, this internship experience, short it may be, has definitely let me experience more things that I could ever have in a typical school term. Learning how to communicate effectively with students with ASD, experiencing so many things for the first time, and lastly, through this internship, I learnt to appreciate everyone around me more. Despite how challenging everyday can be, I witnessed how everyone I know just shower me with so much care and love every day. I know I don’t show enough appreciation for them as I should, it’s simply because I really don’t know how to return the favor. Every day I’m just so thankful and touched to have my family around to give me the much needed care I need, and have my boy around with me as my pillar of support.

My maid and parents always make sure that there is something for me to eat after every training and tuition, even though they have been slacking recently in terms of providing me with food, I’m still thankful of the support they have been giving me throughout this period of time. It’s not like they haven’t been showering me with enough love all the time, but it’s my first time in 3 years being living at home for such a long time, and even though sometimes I can get really easily annoyed due to the lack of alone time, my parents are always understanding when I get pissed off or show them black face when they try to engage in a conversation with me. I feel horrible about it but some times, it’s just get really tiring, and I just want to be alone. I’m really glad that I have them as my support and I’m always appreciative of their efforts to take care of me, and I just really love them. The only reason for wanting to get out to work earlier, is so that I can finally provide for them and just giving them what they deserve for loving me so unconditionally. 

I am, of course, really thankful and appreciative to have my boy with me during this period of time. He’s constantly trying his best to make things better for me everyday, and tolerating my nonsense, and mood swings. I dare say he’s the one who gets the worst end of my angst, but I’m just thankful to have him still with me, despite all the bad things I do to him. Hahaha! See the 76 missed calls? I fell asleep while preparing for my tuition one night, and he called me till 4 plus, until I finally woke up, HAHAHAHHA! Benny, I know It hasn’t been easy for us recently, with all the disagreements and with both of us trying very hard to spend as much time as possible with each other, with both of our commitments and crazily packed schedules. It was indeed a trying time for us, but I just want to tell you that, after all we have been through, it just makes me more certain that you are the one who I want to live with all my life. Thank you for tolerating my nonsense, thank you for always trying to be the more mature partner, thank you for always trying to put a smile on myself no matter how difficult I can get, thank you for never failing to fetch me home from training every time just so I don’t go home any later and can get as much rest as possible. Thank you for just being you. I can never thank you enough, just thank you for being the one I look forward to seeing, on good and bad days.

The last group of people I would like to thank, are the fellow interns that I have met during this 5 months, who made the experience much more bearable and memorable. Even though we may not be doing the same things together, the only thing I look forward to everyday is to 2pm, when we can just sit down together and share about our day. Listening to your experiences and reactions never fail to crack me up. Thank you guys for always being so tolerant towards my nonsense, and just being the best company I can have. It’s amazing how us 3, who sat together randomly during the induction program, turned out to be assigned to the same track, with an uncanny stroke of luck, especially with someone stealing Tricia’s spot at the secondary school, and she had to come over to Track V instead.

Everyone meet Tricia, she eats atas food everyday. Even though this girl is the youngest amongst us, she is so crappy that we can click so well together. I’m so glad that she came over to the same track because without her, we would not have a common target to laugh at all the time. HAHAHA! This cutie pie drew me a birthday card too! She is seriously damn adorable and is seriously going to kill me for this!

This was taken at the end of term 3, when we were still so strong in numbers. After the September holidays, we were only down to 3 interns. 

2 new interns from TP joined us at the start of Term 4, and that was the best thing that has happened to us because we got so much closer together. I miss the times when we just lepak in Com lab 4 and me, sleeping in front of my favorite computer. Thank you for being such amazing company to me, and thank you for the birthday surprise which I really, really appreciated.

Even though this looks like a primary school kid’s work of art, it took a lot of time and effort for me to do it okay? Cause I suck at art. And I would only stay up late after training to do this up for you guys. Hahaha! 

I am truly glad that we managed to get so much closer to each other throughout the internship. I have often seen friends who got really close to their fellow interns and colleagues during their internship stint, but have never thought that it would happen to me because from my past experiences in my part time jobs, my colleagues and I were never this close, and it was always a little awkward when we hang out together. I am sincerely thankful that this happened to us, and it’s amazing how we all are just able to hit off so well at work, and entertain each other so much off work. Thank you guys for being part of this experience, and you all are part of the reason why there’s a void in my heart right now. Let’s meet up again really soon to just catch up and to get fat together alright?

Oh, before I forget,

To my trusty clipboard, I’m sorry you broke suddenly in the middle of class when we were 15 minutes away to the end of internship. I’m really very sad. You’ve served me well, just so you know.

The journey has ended, but the memories would always be etched in my heart.

I’m glad that I’ve achieved and felt whatever I’ve set out to feel when I came to the decision to accept this internship. This experience is definitely something, which I would look back and smile upon 30 years down the road. This is undeniably one of the defining things that has happened to me in my university life, and it’s something that I would hold it in a special place in my heart. From the bottom of my heart, thank you all who have been part of this experience.

The end feels understandably surreal, but I’m excited to embark on the next chapter of my life as well. “Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.”, and now, it’s time to start living.

    

DAY 3 AT BKK!

I know this took a really long while to be up! It’s been already almost a month since we are back, and yet, everyday I’m just looking back on how much fun we’ve had in that short span of time, especially when I feel so lost and tired in school. Sigh. School has been really exhausting as my work becomes more challenging and expectations for me gets greater with time. I’m so incredibly exhausted with life and I just want to soak myself in that awesome days I’ve spent with my favorite person in the world.

Okay, this would be a really short post because we didn’t do anything much on the last day! We woke up earlier than usual because I really, really wanted to bring the boy to the place which has been touted to serve the best wanton noodles in BKK, the sabX2 place, which I went previously!

And here it is! The really nice wanton noodles with pork lard and my favorite pig organ stuff. It’s really the best I’ve ever had and I miss it sooooo much now! It took us a long walk to get there from Siam though, but it’s totally worth the walk!!

Headed over to Siam Paragon for some After You Shibuya toast and pancake because, WHO DOES NOT GO TO AFTER YOU WHEN THEY ARE IN BKK???? Okay, a lot of people… But the Shibuya toast cannot be missed!!!!

This is everything we ordered at After You, and GUESS WHAT. HE DOESN’T LIKE THE TOAST BECAUSE HE’S NOT THE BREAD KINDA PERSON. I’ve been judging him since the moment he said that, and I’m still judging him now. HOW CAN HE. WHAT IN THE WORLD. OMG. WHAT.

Hahaha! This marks the end of our trip! KINDA! Can’t exactly remember the details of the rest of the things we did except for the really EXPENSIVE BURGER KING MEAL AT THE AIRPORT and brisk walking like mad to our gate cause they last call-ed us. Hahaha!

& here’s us, safely back in Singapore (OBVIOUSLY), with our favorite sheep! HEHE! And he bought me kinder surprise from the airport!!!

Benny,

Thank you so much for giving me so much happiness and joy ever since you’ve stepped into my life. Even though I’ve been overseas a couple of times, this was sincerely the best amongst all of them, because I’ve never thoroughly enjoyed myself so much before. Being able to travel alongside you, just makes everything seem better and it’s everything I can wish for from a travel companion. We may have our disagreements here and there, but trust me when I say, there is no one whom I’d rather be with for the rest of my life. Thank you for just being such a constant in my life, and thank you for taking all the nonsense I throw at you on a daily basis. There are simply no other ways for me to express my gratitude and the joy I experience when I’m with you EVERYDAY. Yes, everyday. I always thought it would wear off after a while, this feeling of gratitude and the feeling of squeezing you every time I see you, but no, it just gets stronger with time. What the heck right. Yeah. It’s been a day without seeing your face and here’s me missing you.

Day 2 at BKK!

It was a great second day at BKK because it’s my virgin trip to CHATUCHAK! 😀

We didn’t exactly start the day bright and early but it was still bright and early (y’know…). Hahaha! Bought our breakfasts at the train station: 3 waffles (WAFFLES!), and 4 liu sha baos, which was by the way, the most liu of all liu sha baos I’ve ever had. Benny especially brought me to an area to snap a picture of the last liu sha bao, but, the bao exploded in the container… So there’s no picture of our chocolate liu sha bao, unfortunately.

Chatuchak Weekend Market

So we started on our walk to the actual market itself! There were so many stalls and so much stuff all around that got me so excited like a 5 year old! HEHE! We reached the market before I knew it, and here’s the first thing we ate at the entrance of the market! 

Some pork some bacon, and there was another stick of porky stuff. I love pork. and I’m really incoherent today huh.

The weather was crazy hot on that day, but I was thankful for that because I’d rather it be sunny than rainy, right! So when in Thailand, drink Thai iced milk tea. Gosh, it’s really the best drink on earth & CHEAP! WITH GRASS JELLY SOME MORE! YUM!

I obviously could not wait to drink before taking a picture of it. Hahaha! And we saw some squid eggs, or something like that! Me, being me, this caught my eye, like how fish semen, caught mine. Ok that sounded wrong, but this was really good! I wish it can be found in Singapore or something! It was pretty spicy though, but really yummy!

This seafood paella stopped us in our tracks as we admired how huge and overwhelming the ingredients in the pot were. There was a huge array of ingredients like prawn, mussels, chicken and I can’t remember what, but It was really a lot. So we just stared at each other, and the next thing we knew, we were sitting down and enjoying this amazing dish!

It was my virgin seafood paella experience and my gosh, i loved the rice! It tasted so good and this makes me wanna go around eating all the seafood paella I can find in Singapore. I wasn’t exactly drawn to this initially because… carbs, but damn. This is really good stuff.

After eating, we decided that we better stop cause we were almost of a combined weight of 200kg then. So we walked around the huge ass market, looking at puppies, and all kinds of animals like salamanders, scary squirrels, which looked so lifeless, I couldn’t really bear to stand there to look at them for long. It’s really, really sad. And we saw tortoise eating leaves! I don’t know why I was so fascinated, but TORTOISE EATING LEAVES! COOL!

So after shopping for a good 2-3 hours, which definitely didn’t seem like it, I began to whine for more food. So, Benny had to get 2 coconut ice-creams for me! YAY! SO YUMMY!

We walked a little bit more, and decided to sit down to have some proper food, cause I was craving for tom yum soup. Like a pregnant lady. We got this huge bowl of seafood tomyum with a lot of ingredients for less that 4 or 5 bucks. Quite crazy stuff. And this bowl of soup satisfied my belly a lpt.

We finally got bored of Chatuchak and decided to head back to the hostel cause Benny was whining about how sticky he felt and needed a shower.

Benny’s Pad Thai Stall

After we are done washing up, we decided to take a ferry to Asiatique, this night market that we decided to explore! Before we headed there, we HAD to stop by his favorite Pad Thai stall, since we would not have any chance to have it again!

I thought he looked exceptionally adorable while waiting for his food, but then he showed me this annoying face when I pressed the shutter. So… quite cute only, not very cute.

& here’s us being excited to get our Pad Thai, and being photobombed! Come to think of it, she didn’t actually photobomb us, I photodragged her into the picture. Poor lady. 

& here’s our Pad Thai! Doesn’t look any special but, this was the best plate of Pad Thai I’ve ever had in my life. I wished we had more time here, I would totally have a plate every night.

Asiatique Night Market

Here’s us on the ferry! Feeling so excited because I love being on a ferry, and being surrounded by nice sights!

& here’s us again, because I think that the front camera of iPhone kinda sucks. So here’s one with the back camera, which in my opinion, looks a lot better. Hahaha!

Our first stop at Asiatique! MANGO TANGO, just cause it’s pretty famous for its mango desserts in BKK. 

& Benny volunteered to do an endorsement for them cause he said, he’s like a celebrity. I swear I didn’t make him do this.

In my opinion, I thought Asiatique was a little boring because every stall sold almost the same stuff and probably because I was pretty exhausted from all that walking in a day! Hmm next time I have to go to more exotic night markets like those with fried insects and hipster stores. I’ll remember to plan the next time round!!

We passed by this store selling banana fries with cheese dip! Sounds like something we would totally dig, and so we did. But to our disappointment, it tasted more like lousy sweet potato fries, not too impressive!

Then we saw the ferris wheel and decided to walk towards it! & saw this! TOTALLY MY KIND OF THING TO DO. So I just pleaded Benny to do it with me to relive our childhood. No, more like relive my childhood and let him experience my childhood. HAHAHA!

We had a strategic meeting about which parts we should tear off first, after messing up the dino’s eye, and in the end it was the wrong strategy… And the most difficult part of this was peeling the paper off to reveal the sticker. We took like 2 hours to complete our masterpiece, but it was awesome nevertheless!

So here’s us with our art! And the stall owner even took a picture of us ok! It’s like we are stars at BKK. HEHEHE! 

& here’s basically the end of our amazing day and I can just never be thankful enough for his company and presence, every single day. (:

Day 1 at BKK!

This trip was exceptionally special for me because:

1) It’s my first time traveling to another place right after I’ve landed
2) I’m not traveling with my parents or team mates, or on CIP
3) I’m traveling with my favorite person in the world

 So I landed on Friday midnight (Saturday) from Taiwan after our trip. Despite feeling the fatigue from the 4 consecutive games, trainings and that horrible flu, the first person I saw when I walked out was this boy, and everything just felt like it was good again. I’m very needy when he’s not around okay? Hahahaha! 

We returned to the airport at 5-ish and had breakfast at BURGER KING! YUMMM. I don’t know when will be the next time I’d do that again. Hahahaha! The flight there was non-existent in my memory cause I was just snoozing in that 2 hours and before we knew it, WE’VE REACHED BKK! 

 
So this is us on the plane there, looking really weird but I was too tired to insist on a better picture. 

& I TOOK THE TRAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME AT BKK. Hahaha! I was telling Benny how I’m treated like a rich spoilt brat when I’m overseas, because my parents are really… Yeah.. They act like rich bastards overseas. Hahaha! So naturally, I was very excited to be on the train! 
  
Look at us with our toys! My Perry and his Night fury! 

And here’s him trying to stick night fury on the pole, and chilling on the seat while I’m standing up. HAHAHA! 

We could only check into where ever we were staying at 2pm, and it was only like 10am there or something at that time, so we decided to head to Siam for lunch first! Since the boy loves chicken wings, drumlets ish stuff, I decided to bring him to this rather popular store called Som Tam something, which I’ve brought my parents the previous time! They had pretty decent Thai food and here’s our spread! 

Just looking at these make me so hungry right now! 

Oh, before we entered the store, we saw a rainbow cake, and without a doubt, it’s on our table after our meal.

We’re still on our quest to eat all the rainbow cakes we can find cause it’s SO HAPPY!! 

But us being us, how can we possibly stop at a cake? We headed to Mr Jones’ Orphanage at Siam Center after that, the place where I did not have a chance to visit previously cause my parents were not huge fans of sweet stuff like these! So YAY! I was so excited! (: 

  
The display of cakes! Not a really good picture because we didn’t have enough space to maneuver to get a nice shot! But, it’s a really pretty place! 

But I can’t seem to say the same for the cakes! The red velvet was so horrible because the cream cheese tasted so raw and gross. The kitkat cake, well, it was nice to look at but nothing wow about it! So I’m DISAPPOINTED OK. 

After which, it was time for us to check in! We headed to Victory monument, also a place which I havent been to before, and checked into a little hostel down a dingy alley. Hahaha! But, hey, the place was surprisingly nice and well-furnished! & there were quite a couple of food stalls right outside our hood. So, it’s pretty awesome. 

The cutie pies we saw on our way to the little hostel! (:

We headed out after a 2 hour nap, which Benny refused to get up as usual. Hahaha! Our next stop was to a cat cafe at Thong lo cause Benny loves CATS! We reached thong lo and had to take a pretty longggggggg walk down some street to just arrive here. It was really a pretty long walk, and we even thought we missed the place. Hahaha! So here we are!  

The Purr Cat cafe!

The similar formalities applied when we entered the cafe. Shoes off, wash hands, read the rules then head on in to play with the cats! The plus point here? It’s free to just spend as much time with the cats, unlike singapore where we are charged for the amount of time we spend at the cafe on top of our food charges! The cats here were generally more active, but that could be because of the time we arrived as cats are nocturnal! And the just wake up face cat above, is actually a new born and there were tons of them behind the glass window! SUPER ADORABLE! 

Here’s a glimpse of the cats they have in their cafe, as well as my boy and his favorite HUGE ASS TIGER LIKE CAT. Hahaha! He’s really in love with that big cat, more than he is in love with me. I jealous.

This was what we ordered there! An Oreo smoothie thingy, a thai milk tea (YUM!) and a coconut cake which was really good!
Before we left, we caught a glimpse of the delivery room and this grumpy face cat. Oh there were a couple of grumpy cats and boy, I love them so much because they look so much like me!!! 
 

After which, it was time for dinner! And when in BKK, people who cafehop cannot miss the most popular cafe in BKK, Roast cafe which is located at Seenspace at Thong lo as well! There are a cluster of popular cafes there like Mr Jones’, After you, and Roast! There’s Bonchon chicken there too! It took us a while to locate Seenspace because the map was not quite consistent with the roads we saw so we got confused, but we found it anyway because… my boy in army one leh pls. Hahaha! 

Here we are at Roast! We missed their famous brunch menu, but the dinner menu was pretty extensive as well! The prices were pretty much similar to Singapore’s, probably because of their reputation and the design of the place was pretty awesome. I still think it’s slightly more affordable because we only paid like $50 for everything we ordered, which may very well add up to $60-ish in Singapore, according to our experience. Hahaha! 

This is their pretty menu!

The nice interior! A really cosy and relaxing atmosphere! 

See what I mean by the boy loves chicken wings drumlet-ish stuff? HAHA! Here’s our buffalo wings which were pretty yummy!

The boy’s pasta with some mushrooms and stuff, which we thought would better if it was cream-based. Yeah according to our cafe hopping taste buds. We are good enough now to be food critics. Hahaha! 
My aglio olio like pasta with a perfectly poached egg. YUM

And this was the best french toast I’ve ever had! Stuffed with raspberries, and cream cheese? I can’t remember but this tasted like heaven. Their dessert menu was really enticing, and I would love to try the others on the menu when we are here the next time! But really, this is some good shit french toast. 

After dinner, we decided that we definitely needed some cardio, to ATTEMPT to burn off some calories. So Benny brought me to a night market, which I can’t remember what it’s called. That ping pong show area… But it was my first time to a night market in BKK, so YAY! Hahaha! One of the happiest days of my lives cause I did so many things for the first time! And he bought me 2 nano blocks which I haven’t attempted! 😀 My virgin night market experience was pretty enjoyable but tiring as well, especially after such a longggg day, and we finally ended the day off with some shiok massage at a place he visited before! 

Here’s the end of our first day in BKK, and I really can’t ask for a better travel partner! (: 

“I want everyone to meet you. You’re my favorite person of all time.”

The good, the bad, the very thing that makes or breaks you; everything happens for a reason.

I could not fathom the reason why you drifted away from me. I thought we said we would work things out. I don’t know how we started talking, I don’t know how we began, but when we did, you were just like the piece of puzzle that fit in my life, albeit not snugly. I have never found someone who had so much passion in basketball, who would willingly head to the gym with me, challenge me on so many levels physically. I don’t know when it happened but we started talking everyday, spending time with each other from the moment we wake till we hit the sack. Everyday. For 2 years. I shook off every one’s speculations of us getting together one day because you were the best friend I thought I would never develop any feelings for. But I did. I did when I questioned myself about that hint of happiness I had when you introduced me to your friends, and we hung out almost every other night with them. Yet, despite these feelings, deep within me, I knew there was just something off about you that I can’t quite point a finger to. It’s like you’re not THE ONE. When you decided to leave while I was still treading on that line of being rational due to that cloud of uncertainty and the rashness of diving deep into a relationship, I found out that all these emotions that I’ve been feeling; it’s that sense of comfort we have in things that we are used to having. I didn’t want to leave because it’d be out of my comfort zone, it’d be out of the routine, after all we have spent 2 years of our lives together almost every single day, and not having you around, I just didn’t know what to do.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t devastated when it happened. I was heartbroken. I was upset, and it bugged me a lot longer that I thought it would have. I truly believed and resigned to the fate that I would never find someone like you, someone who understands me well, and someone whom I could feel so at ease with. This episode broke me down to levels that I could not describe but I got back up because I knew I had to, and it’s my own decision to make or break my life.

While I was crawling out of that pathetic pit that I’ve dug myself further into, came someone whom seemed just like the man I’ve always been looking for. He is that disciplined dude that headed to the gym every other day, cooks, preps his own meals, enjoys going to cafes, who had a hell lot of dedication and determination, topped off with that uncanny ability to spring surprises on people with his amazing sense of observation (i.e. stalking, HAHA), and go out of his way for someone whom he really cares about. And his ravishing looks was a cherry (A HUGE ASS CHERRY) on top of the cake. He was one whom I heard about and seen around, but truly believed that he was one who was out of my league. He was too perfect. Too, very, perfect. Most of all, he didn’t even know me.

When we first started talking, we just clicked. I could not stop talking to him because I found him to be so interesting. I was so, so, so inclined to tell him about everything in my life, everything in my day, and even up till now, I still want to tell him about every single thing that is going on in my life, and at the same time, feel totally at ease with him while we sit in silence. The moment when I spoke to him was the turning point of my life, and the sequence that followed thereafter was just magical. Everyday I’m still so, so, so thankful that we started talking to each other, and I am still in shock, and today, I still feel all fuzzy and excited whenever I think about us being together, because he was the guy who was really, out of my league. And for him to even notice me, much less, talk to me, and even like me for who I am, it’s just a dream. It’s like a fairytale that has come true for me.

He is THAT missing piece of jigsaw in my life, that fit so snugly such that I feel whole whenever I think about him. When I’m having a horrible day, all I look forward to, is to seeing his face at the end of the day, and that is what keeps me going for the past months. He is the guy who not just challenges me physically, he makes me a better person because I just have the urge to do my best in everything and to push myself in every single aspect in life, so that I can be good enough for him, and so that he can be proud of me. Most of all, he not only challenges me, but he is also that sturdy pillar of my life that I know I can fall back on, no matter what happens.

Sure, it won’t be easy for us, but all I know is that this love is worth fighting for. I know I will not let you go because whenever I’m in your arms, it just feels like home. It’s been months and, every single day, no matter how tired, how angsty, or how annoyed I am, I’m just so, very thankful that our paths crossed, and I just hope that these 2 paths would just converge into a single unwinding road, which we would walk along for the rest of our lives. 

I LOVE YOU, BENNY. Thank you for being THE REASON.